Brutal AI audits for websites, offers & business ideas
Your business might be cooked.
Drop in your website, offer, landing page, ad, profile, pitch deck, or business idea. Cooked AI will roast what's broken, score the damage, and show you how to fix it.
Free roast. No signup. 30 seconds to the truth.
Nobody understands what you sell fast enough.
Your CTA is hiding like it owes money.
Fixable. Barely.
Pick your victim.
Plus restaurants, contractors, med spas, real estate, investor relations, nonprofits, creators & agencies — all 18 modes here.
Roast first. Truth second. Recovery third.
Submit
Drop a URL, paste text, or upload a file. Ten seconds, no signup.
Get roasted
The funny version. Sharp, specific, screenshot-worthy.
Get scored
A Cooked Score from 0–100 across 16 conversion categories.
Get fixed
A prioritized recovery plan. Serious diagnosis under the jokes.
Sixteen ways a page dies.
The joke gets attention. The diagnosis earns trust.
“Your site opens with ‘innovative solutions for modern teams’, which is the business equivalent of wearing a fake mustache to a police lineup. Nobody knows what you do, who it is for, or why they should care.”
Verdict: You are not out of business. But your homepage is trying.
The page fails to establish offer clarity above the fold. The visitor has to work too hard to understand the transformation, which creates friction before trust is established.
Agencies: turn cold websites into warm leads.
Upload a list of websites. Cooked AI finds the worst conversion leaks, scores the opportunity, and writes the outreach.
Upload 100 websites. Find the most cooked prospects. Generate outreach in minutes.
Open Agency Modesummitroofingpros.example
No proof, buried phone number
downtowndentalgrp.example
Desktop site in witness protection
apexlogistics.example
Vague positioning
brightpathlaw.example
CTA hiding like it owes money
The roast is free. The fix is cheap.
Stop guessing. Get cooked.
Thirty seconds from now you'll know exactly why nobody is buying.
Run Free Roast